Wondering If You Might Be Neurodivergent?
In my work as a counsellor and ADHD coach, I often meet people who have spent years wondering why they feel “different.”
Maybe you’ve always had a sense that you were out of step with others. Or maybe you’ve scrolled past a post or video about ADHD, autism, or another form of neurodivergence and thought, that sounds exactly like me.
If you’re starting to question whether you might be neurodivergent, you’re definitely not alone—and you’re not imagining things.
This post is for anyone who is ND-curious: those beginning to explore what neurodivergence means, why so many people are discovering this part of themselves later in life, and how to approach the journey with compassion and curiosity.
So, What Does “Neurodivergent” Actually Mean?
The term neurodivergent describes people whose brains work a little differently from what society calls “typical.” It was coined in the 1990s by sociologist Judy Singer, and it challenges the idea that there’s only one “normal” way for a brain to function.
Neurodivergence includes:
ADHD
Autism
Dyslexia
Dyspraxia
Dyscalculia
Tourette’s
Sensory Processing Differences
OCD and other cognitive variations
Being neurodivergent isn’t about being broken or disordered—it’s about difference. And those differences can bring both challenges (like struggles with executive function or sensory overload) and strengths (like creativity, deep focus, problem-solving, and innovative thinking).
Many people don’t discover their neurodivergence until adulthood, often because they’ve been “masking”—adapting themselves to fit in with neurotypical expectations at school, work, or in relationships.
Why Do People Start Questioning?
The spark of curiosity often comes from:
New information – A podcast, TikTok, or article that suddenly feels like someone is describing your brain.
Life transitions – Starting uni, becoming a parent, career changes, or hitting a crisis point can reveal patterns that were easier to push through before.
Your kids – Many parents start to notice their own traits while going through the assessment process with their children.
That lifelong sense of being “different” – Struggling with unspoken social rules, intense emotions, or sensory sensitivities that never seemed to affect others in the same way.
Hormonal changes - Peri, menopause, post pregnancy, adolescence - there are all times when the hormones are raging and this impacts hugely on female ADHD symptoms. Many women who have otherwise been coping quite well suddenly can no longer push through.
Someone else in the family or a friend gets diagnosed - given the high heritability for both ADHD and autism (and that we tend to flock together as friends without realising any of us are ND) - this starts to beg the question “I wonder …”
Burn out or complex health - unfortunately so many of us find out when a burn out or chronic health issues knock on our door. These are highly prevalent in ND people.
The Role of Masking
Masking is something many neurodivergent people do, often without even realising. It can look like forcing eye contact, mimicking social behaviours, suppressing stimming, or pushing through sensory overwhelm—basically, doing whatever it takes to “pass” as neurotypical.
Masking can be a survival strategy, but it’s exhausting. Over time, it can lead to burnout, anxiety, low self-esteem, and a loss of authentic identity. Many of my clients describe feeling like they’re always “on” or playing a role rather than living as themselves.
Discovering your neurodivergence can be a turning point. It brings language, validation, and a new way of seeing yourself—not as someone who is “too much” or “not enough,” but as someone whose brain works differently and deserves understanding and support.
It’s Okay to Be Curious
Being neurodivergent means your brain processes the world in ways that don’t always match mainstream expectations. That can be hard, especially in environments designed for neurotypical brains. But it also comes with extraordinary strengths—creativity, sensitivity, pattern recognition, and a unique perspective on life.
The first step is simply allowing yourself to be curious. You don’t need all the answers right away. You don’t need a diagnosis tomorrow. Curiosity is enough.
What You Can Do Next
Reflect on your experiences – Journal, make notes, or just pay attention to the patterns you notice in daily life.
Seek out neurodivergent voices – Listen to people with lived experience. Find voices that resonate with you and balance professional perspectives with real-life stories.
Consider talking to a professional – A counsellor or coach who understands neurodivergence can help you explore safely, without pathologising your experience.
Explore diagnosis—if it feels right – Some people find it life-changing, others prefer self-identification. Both are valid.
Final Thoughts
If you’ve been wondering whether you might be neurodivergent, that curiosity is worth honouring. You’re not alone, and you’re not “making it up.” Exploring this part of yourself can be the start of a deeply validating journey—one that’s not about fixing what’s “wrong,” but about understanding and embracing who you are.
If this resonates, and you’d like to explore these questions in a safe, supportive space, I offer neurodiversity counselling and coaching. Together, we can figure out what your brain needs to thrive. No more round pegs in square holes!
